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I'm not so different after all

By Thomas J. Nurse

The summer of 1996 my daughter, Shelby, was preparing to enter kindergarten in our neighborhood school in a "regular" class and it proved to be quite challenging. Up until that time Shelby had gone to a developmental day program with several other children with disabilities and then attended a "varying exceptionalities" pre-kindergarten program at the public school.

During the last few weeks leading up to kindergarten, Shelby became more and more nervous about entering kindergarten. Finally, after days of trying to find out what was bothering her, she explained that she was "afraid" to go to kindergarten.

I said, "Well kindergarten is a big step." She interrupted, between her tears, and blurted out, "You don't get it - I'm afraid to go to school because I'm so DIFFERENT." Well, my heart sank. I took a deep breath, hid my fear, looked Shelby in the eye and promised her it would be fine.

In reality, I was terrified. Everything I had learned about inclusion in the mid 90's sounded great in theory, but now we were talking about MY CHILD! We both stayed strong and went through with the IEP plans to enter kindergarten. The transition to kindergarten went smoothly because of an excellent teacher and a supportive environment with a few minor adjustments.

Shelby came home from school about six weeks after her first day in kindergarten beaming from ear to ear with the biggest smile. I asked her what was going on and she burst out, "I'M NOT SO DIFFERENT AFTER ALL." This most important lesson was a defining moment in Shelby's life.

Early opportunities afforded to children with disabilities to be included with others their own age can help teach children and communities that they are NOT SO DIFFERENT AFTER ALL!

Image of Shelby Today, Shelby is fully included in school. Her cerebral palsy does require her to utilize a power chair, assistive technology and other supports, but mostly Shelby is just another preteen going through all the changes!

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NECTAC is a program of the FPG Child Development Institute of UNC-CH